LEARNING WITH SLOANE

This morning before we got into the car, I walked outside with Sloane wrapped up tight in my arms and we surveyed the dewy green trees and listened to the birds chatter their good mornings and how do you dos.  The air smelt like new and the mist sparkled in the ar. I squeezed her tighter and tears pooled at the sides of my eyes. It was one of those mornings when the thought of being away from her felt like a kick in the gut.

I cannot get enough of her these days. She is now almost one year and one month and all sorts of things are happening developmentally – it can keep me captivated just to watch her go about her business - heavy cheeks, dark eyes, determined legs, pursed lips breaking out into Ohhh and Ahhhhs and spontaneous laughter, small and busy fingers finding their way to every sort of thing. 

She understands so much more now, her word usage though is still limited to “ball” and “papa” because she is most a fan of the “ba” sound. But she talks in her own way, not anything we can understand but it’s like she is practicing the cadence of speech. She babbles, eyes bright and eyebrows raised as if to say, “Right?” You see?” And we say, “Yes, yes, oh my,” and “Isn’t that wonderful!”

She watches what we do so carefully now. I’ve seen her wipe the floor and table with a paper towel, try to put on socks and shoes and slippers, fake a laugh, pretend to talk on the phone, open and close bottles, put pieces of toilet paper into the toilet, take something off of a shelf, walk away and then come back to put it right back where she found it and step away to admire her work, attempt to use a fork and spoon on a plate, dance, wave bye and hello, blow kisses, kiss her wonderwoman and batgirl figurine, lean in for kisses while making a ‘mmmm’ noise, drink out of a cup, hum, shout, turn on the iphone and ipad, gently pat a baby and not so gently pat rusty…and on and on…all things that she picked up from watching us. What a thrill to have this tiny human as our mirror…and so intimidating, too. 

It is particularly interesting watching her navigating the world of right and wrong. She can discern from my voice when I am stern and serious and lately I’ve noticed that when I see her reaching for something that she shouldn’t and I call out a sudden warning, she jumps a little and obeys, but more often than not, quickly grabs the thing and hands it to me, as if to say, “Oh I was just getting this for YOU, not me.” This has evolved in the past couple of days to this: when she hears me say “No”, she quickly grabs it and then immediately puts it back and then claps, essentially giving herself a round of applause. It’s hysterical.  I think she is trying to figure out how to deal with restrictions. She will also erupt into frustrated and desperate cries if we take away something new that I’m sure she feels like she MUST investigate thoroughly and immediately, but she is quickly consoled and we hand her something else with an explanation of what we’re doing. I am doing so much explaining these days...and praying.

She is learning something everyday, and SO AM I.

You see those photos up there with her in the crown? She put it on like that, tilted to the side, and all of a sudden became a ham when I whipped my camera phone out. The photos are blurry but blurry is real life in recent days.

I have no concrete way to end this post, I just wanted to jot down these few thoughts and observations before they were whisked away by another fading and dawning of a day. It is of value to treasure small moments; add them all up and there it is, my life.